Well I have launched into this solo embarkation I've been clamouring about wanting. And it's been three days fine (well two only since the day has barely begun), since I've trodden my feet and keyboard hands into two EPL mad bosses' offspring of 11 years. The atmosphere is spring, for now I guess. And the giant swamp has not kicked in yet. It's a the beginning of the day and although it does not carry the kind of air I've always expected, I'm carrying a smile from the release I have from the drudgery of AE-ness. I'm mode-ing into comfortable. Not as much as me in my own family's, but the gentleness of the assimilation is very welcoming. The closing walls I sat within, which honestly frightened me, has me enjoying the sudden wealth of space I have now. No breaths blowing down the nape of my neck. No too-close-for-comfort-cos-it's-family-till-hell-breaks-out kind of feeling. And there are no pests I have to speak on the phone to. Most importantly, I'm doing what I love. Yeah it ain't the same as the jingle-jangle of strings and spouting loud, shivering, ecstatic tunes, but who says I'm not in the liberty to musicalise my words? Poetry speaks here, I would like to convince myself. But well, I am in the clouds now cos I love my job!

"Dense intelligence is made into a cockade."

I woke up this morning with this phrase staring blindingly at me in the face.